SKJAM! (skjam) wrote in playthedamncard,
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Yu-Gi-Oh! Manga Synoptic Theater #2

And on to the second chapter!

Duel 2: Lying Eyes



Yugi: Previously, I put together a 3000 year old puzzle and gained a friend. These things might be connected.

(Outside school)

Jonouchi: I watched porn last night, but all the good bits were digitized out. You want to see the video, Yugi?

Yugi: Sure! I may look twelve, but I've got the hormones of a sixteen-year-old.

Jonouchi: Look, there's a TV van parked in front of our building.

Yugi: You think there's a celebrity at our school? Let's look inside the van! ...Darn, mirror glass.

Director: Some kid is smearing up the van windows with his face. I think I'll do something horrible to him.

Reporter: "Bullying is bad." Wow, easiest hundred bucks I ever made. (leaves the story forever)

Director: Hey, patsy!

Fujita (Assistant Director): You called, master?

Director: Find the short spiky-haired kid and bring him to me.

Fujita: Uhh, my contract specifies "no procuring minors."

Director: Naw, I just want you to beat him up on camera. And make sure to look like a student while you do it.

(classroom)

Jonouchi: There's a movie star going to our school!

Anzu: No, there isn't.

Jonouchi: They're in disguise! I can make a bundle as a papparazi once I find out who.

Anzu: You've been smoking crack again, haven't you?

Yugi: I wonder if we'll ever find out why that van was there.

(corridor)

Random Student: Of course I'll tell a complete stranger in a badly-fitting uniform where to find Yugi!

Fujita: The things I do to stay in show business.

Jonouchi: I'm convinced there's a movie star, so I'm going to run off to find one. (leaves)

Yugi: Uh, thanks, Jonouchi.

Fujita: Hey, Yugi, I know who the movie star is, and she's really hot to meet you. Come on behind the gym.

Yugi: Even though I got horribly beaten up the last time I went there, my hormones tell me I must go.

(behind gym)

Yugi: Hi, Fujita, where's the babe?

Fujita: Come a little closer and I'll tell you.

(Fujita beats up Yugi)

Fujita: What a maroon.

Jonouchi: Don't worry, Yugi, I'll rescue you!

Fujita: Eek! The jealous boyfriend!

Director: Cut! You were faa-bulous!

Jonouchi: Are you okay, Yugi?

Yugi: Thanks to you, Jonouchi.

Director: Ick, friendship. We don't need any of that in our show.

Jonouchi: I'ma beat you up!

Director: Just as long as you know that you're being filmed.

Jonouchi: Ooh, I'm on camera?

Director: Not for long! (knee to the groin) Ha! I can do anything I want and edit the film to make you look like the bad guy!

Millenium Puzzle: Shoom!

Director: We'll mosaic your face so you won't be able to sue us. (leaves)

(ZTV parking lot)

Suit: Good job on the show, Director!

Director: Sex and violence does it every time. I think I'll murder someone on camera tomorrow.

Yami: Surprise!

Director: What, you want to make a career of pain?

Yami: No, I want to play a game. We'll take turns rolling a die. Low roll wins, tie means you win.

Director: Nah, I don't feel like it.

Yami: Oh come on, it'll be fun. Look, I rolled a six!

Director: Well, since I can't possibly lose, I'll toss the die at your head. (does so.)

Yami: Thanks to my sharp forehead, you've rolled a technically impossible seven. Penalty Game!

Director: Ahh! My vision is impaired! I cannot see!

Yami: Yes, your whole world has been digitally mosaiced like a bad reality show!

(Outside school)

Jonouchi: Here's the porno video, Yugi!

Yugi: (drool)

Anzu: I like porno too!

Yugi & Jonouchi: No, give it back!
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